Unlikely Love
by kami's butterfly
Summary: Set after HBP, I began to write this about a week before the 7th book came out, so any coincidences are just that, coincidences. Draco is forced into hiding with the Order, Harry doesn't like it...or does he? HarryDraco
1. Unwelcomed Visitors

Chapter 1

"No, no, and did I mention…NO!" Harry exclaimed, slamming his hands down on the dinner table. The entire Weasly family (with the exception of Percy) was seated with him, all the children agreeing with Harry.

"But Harry, they need our help." This from Lupin, who was standing in the doorway of number 12 Grimmauld Place.

Several of the other Order members were scattered around the table keeping silent. Yes, it was Dumbledore's desire for them to find safety in Sirius' old house but it was now Harry's property and it was his decision.

"Trust me, Potter, if I had anywhere else to go, I'd be there. Why would I want to live in this filthy excuse for a house full of blood traitors and mudbloods?"

"Dumbledore wanted this, Harry," Lupin argued.

"And Dumbledore's dead because he trusted _him_," Harry retorted sourly, glaring at the other man standing in the doorway.

"There was no other way to get around his death, Potter, though it was most unfortunate."

Harry turned to McGonagall, Mad-Eye, and Tonks. "What do you think?"

McGonagall answered for them all. "We stand by whatever you decide, Potter."

Harry swore loudly. "Fine, they can stay the night while I decide on the most desolate, hell-ridden, isolated place I can send them."

"How very kind of you, Potter," sneered the second man.

Harry promptly flipped him off and stormed upstairs, slamming his bedroom door and awakening the picture of Sirius' mother who immediately began screaming about 'filthy mudbloods and blood traitors'. Everyone in the kitchen clutched their ears and Mrs. Weasly dashed up the stairs to silence the portrait.

As the two entered with Lupin, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Fred, George, Bill, Fluer, and Charlie all left. "I'm going upstairs to put a few things away," Ron said over his shoulder, "don't want to get any slime on it."

"You might want to look for mudblood filth on it instead," the first unwelcomed guest responded.

Hermione shot a glare at him but continued up the stairs silently.

"Well, I must say, Severus, you always get a warm welcome," Mrs. Weasly pointed out.

"I think it would have gone better if a certain person knew the meaning of the word, 'silent', Malfoy."

"I do not want to be here and they don't want me here."

"Yes, well, seeing as Dumbledore offered his protection to you, we will harbor you," Lupin interjected, looking pointedly at Malfoy. "It is almost Christmas and so I would ask that you put aside any animosity you hold toward Harry, whose house you are in, and be grateful you were spared your mother's fate."

Mrs. Weasly gasped. She had never seen Lupin to be so harsh and would have been a little more sympathetic. Malfoy did not answer and only stared at the floor. Tears rose unbidden into his eyes as his mind replayed the sight of his mother convulsing in pain, crying, pleading, writhing and then going completely still in a flash of green. He fought back the tears and demanded, "Where is my room? I would like to rest."

"It's right up at the top of the stairs, dears," Mrs. Weasly answered, "do you want help with your bags?"

"And risk a blood traitor like yourself ruining my clothes? I'll handle it myself."

With that he stalked away and Mrs. Weasly suddenly didn't feel guilty at all about giving Malfoy the room right next to the screaming portrait. Snape watched him go and shook his head. "Remember, I killed Draco. He can't leave this house until we have all the arrangements made."

Mrs. Weasly rolled her eyes and batted him away. "I know, I know. Now go back or He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named will think you're up to something."

Snape nodded and with a sweeping bow and a whispered "thanks", he vanished back out the door and disappeared into the night.

A/N: So, what did you all think? Please be honest. I've been in a writing rut for almost two years now...so it's really hard for me to write. I'm not telling you this so that you'll all be more sympathetic and perhaps nicer in your reviews, because I want you to be honest, I'm telling you so that you know why my writing is as choppy as it is. Any help and constructive critism is welcomed. Thanks guys!


	2. Alone

Chapter 2 

Snow was building on the windowsills outside number 12 Grimmauld Place, giving testiment to the coming holiday. The only thing more frosty than the windows was Malfoy as he stayed in his room, emerging only to use the bathroom. Mrs. Weasly had originally tried to invite Malfoy to eat with the rest of the Order, but had been turned down so many times (each time becoming increasingly nasty) that she still continued to invite him but carried his food up with her.

Sometimes, he left the food untouched and other times there'd be a little missing. Harry found it aggravating. Malfoy seemed to not want any attention at all and yet at the same time draw all of the attention to himself.

'Typical Malfoy,' he thought.

Since Christmas was so near, everyone was relaxing. Fred and George were off at their joke shop (since it was the busiest time of the year), but the rest of the Weaslys sat in the living room playing a game of Exploding Snap. Hermione was curled in her chair with one of her textbooks and Harry was content to just watch and think.

The Order, Sirius, Tonks and Lupin, Voldemort, his parents, Draco…wait, did he just think on Malfoy and had he called him _Draco_? Harry shook his head, he must be getting tired. Yeah, that was it.

"Hey, guys, I'm pretty tired. I think I'm going to go to bed."

"Goodnight, Harry," Hermione stated at once over the top of her book and the phrase was repeated by everyone else in the room.

As Harry ascended the stairs, he heard quiet sobbing coming Dra-_Malfoy's_ room and Harry stopped. Should he go in? 'Well,' he reasoned, 'maybe if we put aside our differences until the War was over, we could make the housing arrangement more comfortable.' He knocked on the door.

"G'way," came the muffled answer.

"Malfoy, it's Harry, can I come in?"

The door was wrenched open. "What part of 'go away' don't you understand, Potter?"

"The part where your face is all red and your eyes are bloodshot." Harry looked more closely at Malfoy. His hair was messed, as if he had been running his hands through it. "What's wrong?"

Glaring from under swollen eyes, Malfoy slammed the door shut and Harry did not knock again. 'His loss,' Harry shrugged. Instead, he trudged onward to his room and fell asleep almost immediately.

The next morning, Harry woke up to a loud clang of a kitchen pot hitting the floor. "Mrs. Weasly," he yawned, stepping into the kitchen, "you alright?"

"Oh, oh yes, dear, quite alright," she answered, distractedly cleaning the spilled oatmeal with a flick of her wand. "It seems we have one more setting to be put on the table."

At her pointed glance, Harry turned around and noticed what he had not when he had entered. Standing by the door, arms folded across his green silk pajamas, was none other than Malfoy. Harry smiled.

"Come to join us for breakfast, have you?"

The look Harry received wasn't friendly and wasn't even mildly nasty. It was downright loathing. "If it's like that, I'll eat in my room."

With that, he turned on his heel and stomped out. "You can bring me my breakfast!" he called over his shoulder.

Mrs. Weasly shook her head. "Why does he feel so?"

"Because he's a Malfoy and they can't rely on anyone but themselves."

"That's a shame. It would be very lonely without anyone."

Harry agreed. Maybe that was why Malfoy had come down. Maybe it was his way of trying to find someone and Harry had made him retract that searching plea. He was suddenly loathing himself and yet…why? Why did he care what Malfoy did? He'd never cared before…well, except for last year when malfoy had been plotting Dumbledore's death, the bastard.

But had it only been what Malfoy was up to that had drawn Harry to him? Or had it been something he just couldn't come to terms with? Harry shoved that thought aside in repulsion. No, that couldn't be it. After all, he still liked Ginny…right?

Malfoy was shaking as he fell onto his bed. "That was so stupid," he muttered, smacking his forehead. "I mean, what had I expected? He's such a _prat_!"

When Potter had knocked on the door last night, Draco had been expecting to see Weaselbee's mother. The sound of Harr-_Potter's_ voice coming through had started him completely. Draco closed his eyes and immediately saw those beautiful green eyes filled with concern for him, just as they had been last night.

Of course, this morning, when Ha-_Potter_ had come in to see what had made such noise, Malfoy had come back out again. He had glared at Potter just for being Potter.

There was a knock on his door. He didn't even bother to answer and he heard a clink of china on the wooden floor. "Your breakfast, Malfoy. I'm sorry about my comment," he heard Harry say.

"Hey Harry!" Draco heard that god-awful Mudblood call down the hall.

"Good morning," he called back.

"We're going into Diagon Alley today. Want to come?"

Draco heard Potter sigh. "Would love to, but I have a lead that I need to follow."

"Then we'll go with you," this from Weaselbee, himself.

"No, I need to do this alone. Go on to Diagon Alley. I'll see you when you get back."

They continued their conversation as they walked away. Draco distantly heard the front door shut and wondered, 'Where's Harry going? Is he going to be okay?' He was shocked at his own thoughts. '_Why_ do I care?'

Yet, sure enough, when he came down the stairs, he found himself quite alone.


	3. Dreams and Reality

Chapter 3 

Night was pressing on the windows and still, no one had returned. Number 12 Grimmauld Place was actually a very nice manor. And then, as Draco was examining the very extensive library Granger had already plundered, he heard the front door slam open and something very heavy hit the floor.

"What the—" he started, heading toward the door.

The door was wide open and lit by only the moonlight, was Harry's very still body. "Harry!" Draco yelled and immediately fell to his knees. To his relief, he heard Harry's breath coming in shallow gasps. "C'mon, let's get you out of the doorway."

Draco slung Harry's arm around his neck and he felt Harry try to lift himself. His knees gave out and Draco had to hold all of his weight as he led them both to the couch. They both collapsed onto the comfy seat and Harry immediately closed his eyes, trying to fall asleep.

"No, no, Harry, stay awake. What's wrong with you?" Draco said, giving Harry's cheek a few sharp slaps.

"I just need to sleep," he mumbled.

With that, he fell asleep on Draco's chest and stayed there. After a few minutes, Draco decided to shimmy his way out from under Harry, and contact someone from the Order. 'Good,' he thought as he stood over Harry, 'he seems to be okay.'

Snape had covered the security measures, or at least some of them, and he knew he couldn't Apparate or use the Floo Network unless one of the Order Members opened it. Besides, he didn't want to leave Harry alone for any length of time.

"Hedwig!" he yelled out the kitchen window. Maybe, just maybe, she'd come for him.

He'd just finished a scribbled note asking (with as much dignity as he could) that the Weasely family return as soon as possible when Hedwig soared in and landed lightly on the chair. She clicked her beak at him and cocked her head as if to ask what was going on. "I need you to take this to the Weasely's and get them to come back ASAP." Hedwig clicked her beak again. "Please," he added.

Obligingly, Hedwig held out her leg and allowed Draco to affix the note before she took off back out the window. He watched her go and then returned to the living room.

Harry hadn't moved at all, but his right eye was quickly swelling. Draco conjured some ice and a towel and laid it tenderly against his swollen eye. "Where did you go, Harry?" he whispered. "Who did this to you?"

Then, looking at Harry's cut face, Draco realized that he was really very good looking. 'Wait,' he stopped, '_what_'?

But he couldn't deny the urge to kiss that beautiful scar that had made him so special…and those full lips, well, he wanted to ravish them until they were sore and swollen. And, after checking over his shoulder to make sure the Weaselys wouldn't walk in anytime soon, he leaned over and laid his lips gently upon Harry's scar. He allowed himself to also let his hand brush through that untamable creature Harry called hair and found it to be quite soft.

When he pulled away, he was glad to see that Harry hadn't woken. And he even looked a little better as his cheeks had gained a little more color.

Harry was held in limbo between reality and dream. He could feel his entire body aching and knew that it was real. Then, he felt something ice cold pressed against his face and, surely, that was real too? He vaguely remembered passing out on a couch (hopefully in Grimmauld Place, but he couldn't be sure) with someone else. Try as he might, he couldn't force through the dense fog that surrounded his tired and weakened mind.

Then, in what surely had to be dream, someone was pressing lips to his forehead, right where his scar was. He forced his eyes to open the tiniest bit and got a glance of silver hair before falling back into his mind. He at least had the sense to be embarrassed that he was dreaming of Draco-_Malfoy_ kissing him.

But, before he could think on it any longer, he fell out of limbo and was lost to dreams he wouldn't remember when he awoke.

A/N: Here you go, guys! I've been working really hard at finding time to type up all the handwritten parts I have so please bear with me a little longer. I hope you guys like it! R&R!!! Thanks!


	4. Waking Up

Disclaimer: yeah, don't own Harry Potter...and if I did, he so would not have been with Ginny in the epilogue! lol But, alas, I don't and it's probably better that I don't.

Chapter 4

Though everyone had come running as soon as Hedwig had found them, Harry still hadn't woken up a week later.

"How's he doing?" Ron asked Malfoy emotionlessly.

"Same as before, Weaselbee. God," he ran his hands through his hair distractedly before removing the ice from Harry's eye so that he didn't get frostbite, "you're getting as bad as that Mudblood."

Ron went as red as his hair. "You'd better stop using that filthy word, or I'll—"

"Look!" Malfoy exclaimed, "I'm sorry. Old habits."

Ron didn't know what to do. He couldn't believe that Malfoy, _Malfoy_, had actually apologized and really looked like he meant it. He was, in fact, so shocked at seeing the softer side of Malfoy that the only thing his mind could tell him to do was to go and get the answer from Hermione. Yeah, she would know.

Once Ron left, Draco checked to make sure no one else was around and quickly kissed Harry's scar again. "Please, Harry, please come back soon."

He didn't see her as he sat back down on the other couch with his book, but Mrs. Weasely quietly backed out of the room with a smile on her face.

"Hermione, _Hermione_!" Ron gasped frantically, practically dancing in his spot before she obligingly looked up.

"What?"

"I can't believe it! Can you? I mean, really, did you see it coming?"

Hermione frowned. "What in the world are you talking about?"

"I know!" Ron threw his hands into the air. "It's so crazy!"

"Ron." She grabbed her boyfriend by the arm, effectively stopping him. "What happened?"

In a voice so awed it came out as a whisper, he answered, "Malfoy _apologized_!"

Hermione just stared at him. "_And_?"

"And…well, that's it." Ron's face looked slightly deflated.

"Why are you so surprised? Surely you saw his change before?"

Ron looked as if a Blast-Ended Skrewt had just blown up in his face. "Whaddya mean? Malfoy's a git, not a-a decent person!"

Hermione just smiled and returned to her book. "You wait, Ron, I think a lot of things are going to change when Harry wakes up."

"What's wrong with him, Professor?" Draco asked as Snape examine Harry's prone form.

Snape didn't answer but withdrew a small vial from within the folds of his cloak and tipped its contents into Harry's mouth. Almost immediately, Harry's eyes fluttered open.

His head felt as if it was on fire and the sight above him made him feel even worse. Waking up to see Snape's face was just _so_ nasty.

"Ugh," he groaned and tried to sit up, only to feel a pressure on his shoulder pushing him down.

"No, Harry, you should stay lying."

Snape and Harry looked at Malfoy. "_Harry_?" they both asked simultaneously.

Malfoy glared and stood up. "So I called you 'Harry', it doesn't matter. You're still an insensitive, egotistical prick." With that, he stormed off upstairs.

"That'll be the first time he's actually gone upstairs," Mrs. Weasely murmured.

Snape ignored her. "Harry, what have you been doing? You look awful."

"Nothing that concerns you. Am I okay?"

"You tell me."

"I'm sore, but if nothing's broken, I'll be fine."

Snape nodded. "Then you're okay. But try not to get so hurt next time. You've been out for a week."

Before Harry could respond, Snape straightened and swept out, obviously having maxed out the amount of words he could spare for Harry.

"Here you go, dear," whispered Mrs. Weasely. She was holding a steaming bowl of beef stew and though he wasn't hungry, Harry knew better than to try to decline the offered food. Mrs. Weasely smiled as he took it. "Oh wait until Ron and Hermione find out you're awake. They'll be so happy!"

With that, she also left, Harry presumed in order to tell everyone in the house that he had finally woken up. Snape had said he had been asleep for a week. Mrs. Weasely had said Dra-_Malfoy_ hadn't been upstairs since—since when? He obviously hadn't been up in a while. But did that mean that he'd stayed with him? Harry tried to remember the last thing he'd done. He remembered falling inside. He remembered someone calling his name, but who was it?

He couldn't contemplate this long, though, because Hermione, Ron, and Ginny all came flying at him. "Oh Harry!" Hermione sobbed. "We were so worried!"

"Yeah, mate, next time, we're coming with you," Ron added, smiling.

Ron's face hardened as Ginny leaned down and hugged Harry. "Please don't worry me like that again. I was really scared." The intensity in her hug told her how much she did care for him and Harry didn't miss that, or Ron's disgruntled stare. His gut gave a nasty twinge that had nothing to do with Ron's unhappiness and everything to do with the boy upstairs.

A/N: Well...here's the new chappie! It's so nice to have finally been able to write again and now I have ideas spouting out my ears! If only I could have more time to write! Ahh! But I'd take this over writer's block any day! Anyway, hope you liked this chapter...bear with me...I have 12 chapters written in my notebook...I just don't have the time to type them up and I'd much rather be writing more of the story instead of typing up what I already have! -.-' Oh well...don't worry, you'll get the whole story eventually! R&R please!


	5. Coffee Shop Kiss

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter...it's very hard for me to come to terms with that, so writing it on the top of EVERY chappie is very hard for me to do. jk Enjoy my new chappie!

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Chapter 5

Over the next two days it was very difficult to find a quiet moment in which to speak to Malfoy privately. Not that Harry had been trying very hard, mind you. He wanted to talk to him, but every time he envisioned the conversation, it sounded stupid and pathetic. Half of him wanted Malfoy to tell him that he at least _liked_ him, but the other half of him was disgusted at the idea. Of course, with Christmas only two days away, almost all of the Order was collected in Grimmauld Place. The manor, though quite spacious, was growing cramped and sleeping arrangements had to be rearranged in order to accommodate all the newcomers, especially Hagrid. The new sleeping arrangements saw Ron, Harry, Fred, and George sharing a room with Malfoy.

"There is no way in hell I'm sharing a room with him, Mum! I'll go back to the shop and stay there!" Fred argued for what felt like the hundredth time.

"Yeah," agreed George to Harry in an undertone, "I'd rather share a room with Percy."

Harry was immensely grateful that the others just assumed that he felt the same way and didn't expect an equally nasty response. He honestly didn't know how he felt. He didn't want to share a room with Malfoy because he had succeeded in not confronting him about the week he had been a coma, but at the same time, Harry did want to because he wanted to sort it all out.

"Y'know guys," Harry announced, standing up, "I think I fancy a walk in the snow."

Everyone was seated in the sitting room, lounging around and basking in the glow of the large fire in the fireplace. Hermione set aside her book and so did a few of the Order members. "Sure, Harry, just let me get a heavier jacket on," she replied.

"No, I'll take my Invisibility Cloak, I'll be okay," he added quickly as Kingsley Shacklebolt and Lupin exchanged concerned looks. "Really, I'll be fine."

Mrs. Weasely nodded, surprising many of the Order members. "Okay, but be back in an hour, dear, remember, the Death Eaters are everywhere."

Harry nodded eagerly and quickly extracted his Invisibility Cloak from his pocket. "I will be, I promise."

Before he could be held up by anyone else, Harry slipped out into the cold, brisk winter air. He hadn't realized just how stuffy it had become inside with everyone there and he gulped down huge amounts of the winter air greedily. Snowflakes fell onto his cloak but almost immediately melted into nothingness, keeping him invisible. However, as he neared the local coffee shop, he slid into an alleyway, stuffed his cloak into his pocket and reemerged into the throng of last minute Christmas shoppers.

The café was lit brightly with a warm glow. Christmas lights wove their way around the cashier's counter and up the stairs leading to the upper floor. Large wreathes hung off the walls and candles adorned every table and window.

"And what would you like, my dear?" the cashier asked.

"Mocha cappuccino with a mint flavor shot," he replied, "please."

"Large, dear? You look like you need it."

Harry nodded, silently agreeing with her on both counts. He handed over his muggle money and received his cappuccino. Then he found a table in a secluded corner, partially obscured from view due to a large, fake Christmas tree, and sat down. He took a small sip from the steaming cup and then took to staring at its contents as if hoping to have more luck at seeing the future in his cappuccino than in Trealawny's tea leaves.

"I didn't know you were a caffeine addict like me."

Harry snapped out of his reverie and looked up at the speaker. "What are you doing here?"

Malfoy gave him a half smile and asked, "Mind if I join you? Then you can interrogate me all you want."

"Go ahead," Harry answered and then gestured to the chair sitting opposite him.

Malfoy took it and smiled sheepishly again. "How are you feeling?"

"Okay, I guess. Still sore. What happened?"

Malfoy recounted everything that had happened the night Harry had stumbled through the door at Grimmauld Place, leaving out the kiss he had placed gently on his scar. All through his little spiel, Harry had fixed him with a penetrating stare. Malfoy had the sensation of being pierced by twin green lights. And yet, he had never fully appreciated how beautiful Harry's eyes were. They glittered beautifully in the candlelight. When Malfoy finished, Harry didn't say anything.

"…and, well, that's it. I swear," Malfoy added at the end in case Harry hadn't realized that the story was over.

Harry still didn't say anything, didn't even move.

"Hey, you okay? C'mon, say something."

"So it was you."

"What do you mean?" Surely Harry wasn't blaming him for his injuries.

But Harry didn't answer him. "Mrs. Weasely said when I woke up that you hadn't gone upstairs in a long time. Where were you?"

"Obviously downstairs, then."

Harry noticed the faint blush cross Draco's cheeks. "Where downstairs?" Harry clarified. He couldn't help his anxiousness, though it was too much to hope for.

"I was," Draco paused and cleared his throat though his next words came out as a whisper, "with you."

Harry had leaned forward in order to hear him clearly and he smiled. "I thought so."

"I mean, it was nothing personal, but you gave me such a scare when you passed out. And the Weaselys didn't get there, and you couldn't be left alone, you looked horrible, and then Snape couldn't come right away, but he wanted someone to keep an eye on you, and—"

Harry couldn't take the excuses anymore and leaned even further over and kissed him. He had been worried that Draco would not respond and that he would, instead, be repulsed. But he needn't have worried. Draco returned the intensity and pressure in equal and they soon forgot everything.

Draco couldn't believe it. Harry had kissed him! It almost seemed too good to be true. He must be dreaming. But in a dream, he wouldn't need to breathe and his lungs were definitely starting to burn.

With reluctance, he pulled back, chest heaving. He could see that Harry was also breathing hard, lips slightly swollen. Draco searched for something to say. Nothing came to mind that could accurately describe how he felt or what he was thinking. For an immeasurable amount of time, they just stared at each other and then Harry broke the silence.

"How?" he asked. "Why?"

"I don't know," Draco whispered.

Harry drew his lower lip into his mouth and chewed on it. It had been a bad idea to kiss Malfoy. He shouldn't have done it. It was perfectly possible that he would die in his search for Horcruxes. It wouldn't be fair to Draco to bring him into such pain and if Harry really cared for him, he would let Draco live a life that had nothing to do with Horcruxes, Voldemort, or Harry.

"This was a bad idea. I shouldn't have kissed you. I'm sorry."

Before Draco could say anything, before his befuddled brain could process what Harry had just said, Harry stood up and vanished out of the café, the bell of the door ringing ominously. As what Harry said sank in, Draco's lips burned. Everything on him burned: his lips, his throat, his lungs, his eyes. Hot liquid fell from his eyes, unbidden and unwanted, but unstoppable. He was suddenly glad that the Christmas tree concealed the table for he didn't want anyone to see him crying.

Harry's heart was beating against his chest so hard it was almost painful. His lips burned. There had been such intensity in that kiss and for once all the burden that he hadn't known he was carrying was lifted. He'd felt light as a kite. Now he felt as if he were carrying twice the load than before. He shook his head as he entered Number 12 Grimmauld Place under his Invisibility Cloak.

"It's okay, guys, just me," he managed, his voice quivering only slightly as he pulled his Cloak off.

Concern flitted over every single person's face as they saw him. "Harry, are you alright?"

"What happened?"

"Was it Death Eaters?"

"Did you see into You-Know-Who's mind, again?"

Harry had no idea who had said what. All he wanted was to find the solitude of his bed. "I just-I'm fine. I just want to go to sleep. No, really," he repeated before Mrs. Weasely, Hermione, or Ginny could argue, "I'm fine, just tired."

"You're white as a sheet."

"I just need to rest," he repeated.

Ginny grasped his hand and her touch seemed to burn him. He was unworthy to be touched by her, not when he had broken up with her so that she would not be as hurt in the War and then just been kissing Dra-no, Malfoy. As gently as he could, he removed his hand from Ginny's and whispered, "Good night."

As he walked up into the deserted upper floors, he realized he had had a taste of freedom and held it close so as to remember it in the troubled days ahead. He had to go on alone. He couldn't cause anyone else the pain that had only ever been meant for him.

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AN: Well, that's another chappie done! Yay me! I'm really trying very hard to keep this story going on a fast pace. Anyway, the more reviews I get, the more psyched I get to post a new chapter:hint, hint, nudge, nudge: So let me know what you guys think! Thankies! R&R! 


	6. Christmas Eve

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Despite my wishes, I doubt J.K. would let me have her characters...and that's probably a good thing for them! lol

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Chapter 6 

When Harry awoke, he realized he was most definitely not alone. 'No, of course not,' he remembered, 'we're all sharing.' Fred and George were sharing the one bed across the room. Ron was snoring loudly beside him and Malfoy had dragged his camp bed as far away as he could from the others. Even asleep, he exuded the air of superiority, and yet, to Harry, he saw the insecurities that plagued the pale boy. His back faced them and he was curled up upon himself. Harry forced back the impulse to go over to Dra-no, he admonished, _Malfoy_, and climbed off the bed and slipped down the stairs.

Most of the other Order members were already up and bustling around, getting Grimmauld Place ready for Christmas as it was Christmas Eve. Hagrid had managed, though Harry had no idea how, to procure a live Christmas Tree and Lupin, Tonks, McGonagall, Charlie, Bill, Fluer, and Mr. Weasley were all putting up decorations. A wreath went flying past his right ear, clipping him only slightly.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Harry!" Tonks wailed. "Really, I am!"

Harry laughed. "It's quite all right."

The smell of Mrs. Weasley's cooking wafted under Harry's nose and his stomach gave a gurgle. He passed through the sitting room and emerged into the kitchen, his stomach growling loudly.

Mrs. Weasley was hard at work cooking up so much food Harry almost began openly drooling. "Good morning, Mrs. Weasley," he greeted.

"Oh, good morning, Harry, dear. You look much better than you did last night. Are you sure you're okay?"

He smiled. "Yes, Mrs. Weasley, I'm fine."

"Okay, but just to be sure, I'm going to give you a little more to eat and I want you to eat it all."

"Thanks," he answered as he handed him a heaping plate of scrambled eggs, hash browns, pancakes and grapes.

Harry immediately dug into the food, unable to deny his stomach any longer. After a bit, he slowed down and actually enjoyed the taste of the food instead of swallowing it nearly whole. Mrs. Weasley talked to him as he ate, telling him all that needed to be done and all she was doing at the moment.

"…I've been cooking all morning. I want to have all the food at least somewhat prepared for tomorrow. Have you got all your presents wrapped? Once they're finished decorating the sitting room and the tree, you can bring down your presents for everyone. I think it would be best if we huddled each person's presents together in a pile so that nothing gets destroyed tomorrow morning. Oh, and how much Christmas pudding should I make? There's eight of us Weasleys, you, Hermione, Draco," Harry's gut gave an unpleasant lurch, "Lupin and Tonks, Hagrid-he eats more than three people together-, Minerva, Severus-oh, I know you still hold a grudge against him, Harry, but please, it's Christmas Eve, try to be nice-, and Fluer. I think I'd better make more of everything. And I forgot Mundungus and Kingsley, oh! And Dedalus Diggle and Elpias Doge. Oh dear, I hope I've brought enough food!"

Another figure walked into the kitchen and Harry looked up, expecting to see one of the Weasleys or Hermione. Instead, he saw Malfoy and he quickly finished his breakfast and bolted out of the room. He did not want to face Malfoy at all. He knew it was cowardly and mean, but Harry was sure that if he opened his mouth, he would not say what he needed to say but would say what he wanted. What he wanted, however, was something he could never have.

Harry took refuge in his bedroom where Ron, Fred, and George were still dead to the world. Harry quickly extracted the presents he had gotten for everyone. Knowing that he could have been busy hunting Horcruxes during Christmas, he had done his Christmas shopping over a month earlier. However, he pulled one small box wrapped in silver paper and put it aside. After Malfoy had arrived, Harry had gotten him a present as well, only because he had seen it in the shop window on his way to deal with Nagini. He'd debated giving it to him ever since he'd woken, but now Harry knew he couldn't. It wouldn't be fair to Malfoy, especially after having given into his own compulsion and kissing him. His lips twinged again. God, he wanted to feel those lips against his again. He shook his head as if that would rid his mind of the thought. Gathering up the other packages, Harry reappeared downstairs. Only McGonagall remained in the sitting room.

"Good morning, Potter."

"Good morning, professor. The sitting room looks amazing."

Indeed, the room did look amazing. Lights and Christmas baubles adorned almost every surface. Wreaths hung from the windows. The tree positively glowed. Mistletoe hung at various spots along the ceiling.

Piles of ornately wrapped gifts had already been started around the Christmas tree so Harry had to look at he other To: and From: tags to make sure he put his presents in the right piles. As he laid down his last package (another book written entirely in runes for Hermione), he noticed a significantly smaller pile sitting next to it. It didn't have nearly the amount of packages as the other piles. Harry bend down, purely out of curiosity, and flipped open the folded To: From: card. It read,

_To: Draco_

_Thanks for helping take care of Harry. _

_Best of luck in the future! _

_From: Hermione_

Harry's stomach gave another twinge of guilt. She had written '_Best of luck in the future_'. What did she mean by that? Was Dra-_Malfoy_ planning on leaving? Harry's heart sped up in fear and his gut clenched uncomfortably. Did it mean something else? But, Harry sighed, it would be for the best if he left.

"You have enough presents, Potter, don't go stealing mine," a cold voice snapped behind him.

Harry spun around. Malfoy was standing there, his body emanating hatred but his eyes, those beautiful gray pools—Harry stopped that train of thought. Harry could see a different emotion in those eyes. Was it fear? Or hurt? Harry realized in that moment that both emotions were playing in his eyes.

Quickly looking away, harry made to get up and escape the uncomfortable situation, but found his way blocked by Malfoy. "Get out of my way, Malfoy," Harry demanded and he tried to put as much loathing and hatred into his voice that he could muster.

"Why?" was the response he got.

Harry looked back into Draco's face and answered, "Because this is the way it has to be. Voldemort will use anyone who is close to me against me. I have to do this alone." With that, he pushed his way past Draco and went to find sanctuary somewhere in the overcrowded manor.

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A/N: Well, what do you guys think? I really like writing this chapter because things are becoming muddled and confused, just like Harry! I'm afraid that you're probably going to have to wait a little longer for the 7th chapter because I haven't had a chance to type that up and I don't forsee myself having time to type it up anytime soon. In fact, I tried to get this chapter up last night, but it was cooperating, so I'm trying to get it up in the 5 minutes I have before I have to rush off to work! I hope you guys liked it! R&R please! I'll love you forever! Thanks! 


	7. Christmas Day

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. I just like messing with the characters!**

Chapter 7

Christmas morning dawned bright and cold. As Harry woke up, he noticed that only Ron remained fast asleep. Malfoy's camp bed was empty as was the bed the twins had been sharing.

"Ron, wake up, Ron," Harry urged. He only got incomprehensible mumbling in return. Harry rolled his eyes. Crawling over the headboard, Harry yelled from the doorway, "Ron! Presents!"

Just as he expected, Ron shot upright and said blearily, "Som'on' say 'resents?"

"Yeah, Ron, it's Christmas!"

Ron looked suddenly awake and he clambered out of bed. "Happy Christmas, mate!"

"Happy Christmas," Harry answered with a smile. 'Now let's get downstairs! I'm sure everyone else is already done opening their presents!"

With that, nothing more needed to be said. The two rushed down the stairs and found the sitting room to be ready to burst with people. All the Weasleys were already wearing the hand-knitted sweaters that Mrs. Weasley had made and even Hermione had been given one.

"Happy Christmas, everyone!" Harry and Ron yelled as they came into view.

Hagrid was seated on the floor, taking up much of the floor space not occupied by presents or the Christmas tree. Everyone else was scattered about, a few people having been shunted to the kitchen table. Harry saw Ginny smile at him fro her perch on the arm of Fred's armchair, but his eyes were seeking out someone else. Hidden behind part of the lower branches, Harry found Malfoy. Immediately, he looked away. He couldn't have feelings for Malfoy. It wasn't fair to him.

"Well, c'mon, now, Harry! Open your presents, let's see what you got!" Hermione exclaimed, "And thanks for the book!"

Harry nodded back at her with a smile and squeezed into a sitting position on the floor near his pile. He'd gotten a present from everyone, it seemed. Mrs. Weasley had knitted him another sweater (which he immediately put on over his pajamas); Hagrid, another picture of his mum and dad posing with Hagrid, barely reaching his forearm; McGonagall, a set of small boxes that hid anything you put in them by transfiguring them into something else; Ron, a Quidditch book ("Figured you'd need some normalacy, mate."); Hermione, a book about charms…and many more gifts from everyone. Snape had even wrapped him a beazor with the comment, "You're sure to eat something you shouldn't."

Harry's fingers hurt from unwrapping so many presents. Most people, having watched him open their present to him, were now making their way into the kitchen to procure themselves breakfast. There was still one package with his name on it. Picking it up, he examined the small box wrapped in golden paper with silver strips. There was no 'From' name and yet, Harry had a feeling he knew who it was from. Harry opened it and found a little box and, upon opening that, he found a golden chain necklace sitting upon a little cushion with a note under it. Holding up the chain to look at it more closely, he opened the note and read:

_A golden chain_

_for the Golden Boy._

_P.S. I don't care_

Harry's heart was hammering in his chest. He slipped the necklace over his head. It was light, barely weighed anything, but to him, it felt like it weighed a ton. Looking up at everyone crowded into the kitchen and dining room, he saw Malfoy look at him and Harry quickly looked away.

Ron and Hermione each extracted themselves from the throng and sat down next to Harry, setting their food on the floor beside them. "Good haul this year, eh?" Ron asked, surveying all the piles of unwrapped gifts.

"Erm, yeah." Harry looked around. "I—I think I'm going to take my stuff upstairs. I'll be right back."

With a flick of his wand, all of his gifts rose into the air and he guided them up the stairs. In reality, he just wanted to think. He was sure Malfoy had given him the necklace. Harry absentmindedly pulled out the gift he would have given Draco. But he couldn't encourage the relationship. Not when Harry could die.

"Shouldn't you be downstairs?"

Harry looked up and saw the one person he both wanted and didn't want to see. "Not now," Harry answered, turning away.

He heard the door click shut after a moment, but the sudden movement on the bed told him that Malfoy hadn't left. "I meant what I wrote."

"Kissing you was mistake. I shouldn't have done it."

"Why?"

"Because now you want a relationship."

"And you don't?"

"Exac—well, no, I mean, yes, I mean, no—"

Draco put a hand on Harry's shoulder to stop his rambling. "Harry, my father is a Death Eater. I think I know, better than anyone, how the Dark Lord works. I—"

"Exactly. You know that he would find out you're still alive and hurt your family and you and what if I die? What if—"

"What if the sky turns red and your nose falls off?" **(Disclaimer: That was from Disney's Pocahantas, not me!)** Draco interjected. Harry was stunned into silence by the sheer absurdity of it. Draco continued. "We'll work through it. Harry," Draco was now straddling Harry, their faces centimeters apart, "I know the dangers and I don't care."

And they were kissing. Harry felt himself fall backward so that Draco was lying on top of him, kissing for all he was worth. This was truly heaven. Nothing in the world except Draco existed for Harry. He clutched onto Draco's back with one hand and the other went to his hair. It was so soft. He wished the moment would never end, that he could stay lost in the sense of Draco and never find his way back to reality. Reality…

Harry slowly pushed Draco away from him, but Draco wouldn't let Harry sit up. They were both out of breath and flushed. "No, no, Draco, no," Harry repeated. It seemed that those were the only two words he could manage.

Draco smiled. "I believe you said that the night I arrived here, and you let me into your home. Now let me into my heart."

And Harry couldn't find an argument to that because Draco had put those delectable lips back against his own and Harry was lost again in a maze of wonderful bliss. He didn't want to be found.

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A/N: Sorry it took me so long. I would have had it to you sooner, but I lost the handwritten version and I really didn't want to rewrite it. Anyway, R&R as usual. Thankies! 


	8. I'm Sorry

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Nothing at all.

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Chapter 8

Harry couldn't believe what he was doing as he climbed the stairs to the second floor where the library was. There was a note clutched in his hand.

_Meet me in our spot._

_Same time._

_Love_

Harry still thought it was a bad idea to be engaging with Draco in his version of a relationship, but he wanted to do it. He couldn't argue that the time he spent with Draco was the calmest, most enjoyable time he ever experienced. Ron and Hermione were always badgering him about Horcruxes and the time he spent alone with Ginny was fraught with uncomfortable silence.

In Harry's other hand, Harry was holding the gift he had gotten Draco for Christmas. His palm was sweating. He just hoped that Draco would like it.

Harry knew exactly where to find Draco and he wove his way into the darkest, farthest, most isolated corner of the library. All the tension between his shoulders disappeared as the blonde gave him a sweet smile.

"Hey," Harry managed breathlessly. He leaned over and gave Draco a small kiss. For that second, time seemed to freeze. "What's up?"

Draco shrugged gracefully. "Just wanted some alone time. I mean, it's not like I can hold your hand like this with everyone around."

"I'm sorry. I just—"

Draco immediately backpedaled. "I didn't mean that. I just meant," he stood up to hug Harry, "that I missed this closeness."

Wrapped in his strong arms, the world really did stop for Harry. Nothing at all mattered. Not Voldemort, not Ginny's feelings, not Horcruxes, nothing. It seemed that every moment he stayed wrapped in Draco's arms, was a moment of bliss. Not a moment in which he slipped into someone else's life, but a moment in which he was in his own world, just in a place that Voldemort would never be able to get him.

"I'm sorry," Harry murmured again against Draco's cheek.

Draco's eyebrows furrowed. He pulled away and looked down at the slightly shorter man who had stolen his heart. "For what?"

For Draco, he was perfectly happy, at least for now. He knew that Harry loved him, and he was content to wait until Harry realized it. He understood the pressure Harry was under and so he didn't push him.

"For not wanting anyone to know. I know it's not fair to you."

Draco pulled Harry's face upward so that Harry would look him in the eyes. "it's also not the right time. I highly doubt that the Weasley's would be happy with you breaking Ginny's heart—though I know she won't see it that way—and the other's would probably not like the relationship, either."

"Aren't those all signs that this is wrong?"

Draco sighed. His heart ached seeing all the hurt plaguing the Golden Boy. At school, Harry had always seemed so cool, so confident, and Draco had envied him in that. Seeing all his insecurities broke Draco's heart. He wanted to wipe them all away, tell Harry that he was invincible and that nothing could stop him. But Draco knew that his lies, as good as they were, could not pass for truth in this case.

"Harry, sit down." The two sat on the floor, backs resting against bookcases. Draco took a deep breath before continuing, half afraid of what he might hear. "If you can tell me, that in your heart, you think this is wrong, then I will back off and everything will go back to normal. But if it's just other people's opinion bothering you, than you should just ignore them." Draco laid a soft kiss on Harry's scar. "This scar made you special to the Wizarding world," he paused and laid his hand lightly on Harry's chest, "but your heart is what made you special to me."

Harry smirked. "How very poetic, and how very unlike you."

"Why are you so keen on thinking that I'm trying to deceive you?"

Harry looked away. He didn't want to tell Draco that the reason was because he was afraid to give himself something he wanted. Especially if he could get hurt or, more importantly, could get others hurt. Yet, Draco knew.

"I understand. It's okay," he added before Harry could argue, "really, it's okay. When Voldemort is defeated, though, please give us some consideration."

As Draco made to get up, Harry clutched onto his hand. "Wait, I—I don't—"

Draco smiled sadly. Every word that was coming out of his mouth was breaking his heart. "I'll always be here for you, okay? But it was wrong of me to put this pressure on you right now. I'm sorry. I guess I hoped it would help relieve some of your stress."

Tears were burning their way over his eyes and down his cheeks. Draco didn't care, he let them fall. Harry was crying, too. Draco knew that he had just promised to wait until after the war, but he wanted one last kiss.

Before Harry could stop him, Draco crushed their lips together. Harry responded with equal fervor, as if knowing it could be their last one. Tongues entwined and tears mingled. Their hands grasped hair and each other's body. Draco pulled away, wincing as it killed a small part in him to do so. Their faces only inches apart, Draco whispered, "I really am sorry."

With that, he pulled away, resisted every nerve in his body telling him to go back to Harry, and walked out of the library.

"So am I," Harry whispered back into the empty room.

He also stood up on shaking legs. The little package fell to the floor with a soft 'plop'. Harry picked it up and fresh tears began to trail their way down his face. He was so stupid, so, so stupid. But the damage was done and he hated himself for it.

"Harry?" a soft voice asked.

Harry looked up, half hoping that it would be Draco coming back to save him from his insanity. It was Hermione.

"Harry," she went to him and wrapped her arms around him, sinking to the floor. "Harry, what's wrong?"

Harry only sobbed harder.

Malfoy nodded curtly to Granger as she passed him. He saw the look of concern flit over her face and he wasn't surprised, sure that his face was red and splotchy as he continued to cry. She was on her way to the library and he was glad. Harry needed someone right now. With a sigh of regret, he closed the door to his bedroom with a soft click and sealed himself away from everyone else. Before long, his sobs were shaking his whole body. He felt cold and inhuman. He could barely breathe and his heart barely beat, as if it was too broken to work properly anymore. He felt like he was dying.

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A/N: Well, lucky for you peoples, I'm sick right now, so I've been typing up chapters and since you were all so nice as to review, I figured I'd be nice enough to post another chapter. Aren't you so happy? I hope so. Anyway, please tell me what you think. R&R as always! Thankies! Remember, reviews make me feel better and I need to feel better, right now I feel like I've been run over by a Mack truck. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the chappie! 


	9. Revelation

Disclaimer: Sorry, but I don't own Harry Potter or any of the characters. Otherwise, I'd let you borrow them! lol .>

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Chapter 9

"Harry, oh Harry," Hermione whispered into his hair, rubbing his back as she held him. "What's wrong?"

"I—I w-was so—so st—stup—pid," Harry managed between sobs. He reburied his face on her shoulder but yelled, "I'm so stupid!"

"You're not stup—"

Harry pulled away from her. His green eyes were burning with an anger she'd only ever seen once before. "Yes, I am, Hermione! I'm the stupidest person on this planet!" His anger was giving way to more sobs and he slammed a hand into the floor. "I hate myself and everyone's going to hate me! I just want to die!"

Fresh tears broke over his face and Hermione pulled him back to her. "I don't hate you."

"W-well th-then you sh-should."

"No," she said, "Harry, what happened between you and Malfoy?"

That startled Harry so much that his tears stopped. "Wh-who said an-anyth-thing about Mal-Malfoy?"

"I passed him on the way here. He was crying, too. What happened?"

"Nothing."

Hermione gave him a look that clearly said 'I-know-you're-lying-and-that-was-completely-obvious'.

"Would you like to tell me the truth?" she paused for a moment and then added, "Did you break up with him?"

Harry's eyes went as wide as saucers before he realized who he was talking to and then he gave a defeated sigh. "How—how did you know?" Harry rested his forehead against her shoulder, unable to look her in the face any longer. "Were we that obvious?" Then a horrible thought struck him. If Hermione knew, wouldn't Ginny? "Oh Merlin, I've really screwed up. Now Ginny has even more right to hate me! And Ron and Mrs. Weasley. Oh God, I should just die right now!"

"Would you _stop_ talking like that?" Hermione demanded. "No one else knows, Harry, you weren't that obvious. All they know is that this last week you've been happier than we've seen you in years. They don't know why."

"Then how—"

"Because I've never seen Malfoy cry and he's certainly never passed me without some kind of insult. Then I found you crying. It's not hard to put two and two together."

Tears were once again threatening to escape over the brim of Harry's eyes. They fell one after the other into Hermione's sweater, but if she felt them, she didn't acknowledge it. "I am a little disappointed, however, that you didn't at least tell Ginny you were gay. It will hurt her feelings, but it will hurt her less if you say it then if she finds out from a third party."

"It doesn't matter anymore."

"What do you mean?"

"I—I told Draco 'no' and he said he'd wait until after the War."  
"Then it still matters."

"No, Hermione," Harry looked at her and she saw a cold ice in his eyes. "There isn't going to be an 'after-the-war' for me."

Hermione's breath caught in her throat. She couldn't believe it. Harry was planning on his death. It was one thing to have doubts about surviving. But to _plan_ for death? That was insane. Sorrow and anger welled up in her, ready to burst.

"Harry—James—Potter," she began, "I can't believe you would save something like that!"

Harry said nothing. He just continued to stare at Hermione with that ice in his eyes. "It's the truth," he finally murmured.

"That's not true. You have already fought Voldemort and won. You've come out alive. You can do it again, I now you can. You just have to believe in yourself."

Harry shook his head. He hadn't planned on telling anyone, but there was no other way to make her see that it simply didn't matter anymore.

Hermione watched as the ice melted in Harry's eyes and left them hollow. She was practically shaking. This was so unlike the Harry she had thought she'd known. Now, suddenly, he was crying again, but they were silent tears. When he spoke, his voice was surprisingly steady.

"I am the last Horcrux. The Prophecy said that neither could live while the other survives. Apparently, neither of us can die while the other still lives."

His words shocked Hermione into silence. When she finally found her voice, it shook with tears that had sprung from her eyes. "Oh, Harry!" she cried and hugged him again.

For a bit, they both cried, Hermione mourning the news she'd just heard and Harry mourning the loss of the one good thing in his life. When Hermione finally calmed, she looked at Harry and asked, "Does Malfoy know?"

Harry shook his head. "You can't tell anyone. I wouldn't be able to stand facing Voldemort if everyone treated me like a dying man. I just want them all to treat me normally. Can you keep my secret?"

Hermione nodded, tears still running down her face. "But how can Voldemort be defeated? This has all been for nothing."

"No. I hope that if I kill Voldemort at the same time he kills me, we'll both die and he'll be defeated. But if not, I know that you guys can defeat him." His voice was matter-of-fact, but his heart broke seeing her anguish.

"I didn't want to tell you."

Hermione rubbed her cheeks until her face was dry, if red. "It's just, just so horrible."

"Hermione, you in here?" Ron called.

"Uh…uh…right here, Ron!" she yelled, standing up and moving away. "I'll head him off. Hang in there, Harry."

He managed to muster a half-hearted smile. If this was what it felt like to die, then maybe he didn't want to do it. Maybe death would be too painful for him. He'd surely survived worse pain, like regrowing all his bones in his right arm, but hten he'd known that he was going to survive. Now, he didn't even have that small ray of hope.

Even though he'd known that he was the last Horcrux since he'd destroyed Ravenclaw's Horcrux, it hadn't seemed real. Saying it made it seem more real. More horrifying.

He didn't want to die.

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A/N: Here you go guys, another chappie! lol Yay for me! I'll try to get the next chappie up soon, so keep checking back! R&R as usual, thanks! 


	10. Time's Up

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, etc. If we could all just assume that nothing has changed and will never change from the previous chapters' disclaimers, I wouldn't have to always write this. But hey, if you need it repeated ten hundred more times, you're gonna be out of luck because there are only a few more chapters left in this story.**

Chapter 10

Another week had gone by, then a month. Two months passed before the Order could get any news on Voldemort. Snape hadn't been near the Order's hideout since Christmas. Both Harry and Draco kept to their separate rooms. When Harry did emerge in order to pick at his food and act falsely cheerful, the others didn't know how to act. He'd been able to act normal in the beginning, and even Hermione had been able to treat him as if she didn't know he had to die. Now, the strain was showing.

"Someone get Harry," Lupin ordered, rushing into number 12 Grimmault Place. "We know where Voldemort is."

Hermione looked stricken. "What is it, 'moine?" Ron asked.

"N-nothing," she answered, hiding her face behind her book.

"Harry!" Lupin yelled over them.

Harry appeared a minute later. His eyes were as hollow as his voice. "What?"

Hermione looked over her book and found Harry's eyes. Everyone else was waiting anxiously to hear more from Lupin. But she didn't want to hear it. She didn't want to hear the words that spelled out Harry's death.

They heard a creak on the stair and everyone looked up. Malfoy was standing on the top. "Can I join your little party?" he sneered. "Sounds like so much fun."

Lupin ignored him. "Harry, Voldemort is planning an all out war on London if you don't meet him in the Ministry of Magic within the next 24 hours. Snape barely lived long enough to tell me. Now, we've set up defenses all around London. All the Aurors are setting protective spells over the Muggles. We need to get you out of here, Harry, as far—"

"No."

Lupin looked at Harry. "What?"

"Get yourselves out. Put defensive spells over every house and then get everyone to safety."

"But Harry—"

Harry snapped. "It's got to be me, Lupin! I have to be the one to face Voldemort," he paused and looked at Hermione who nodded, understanding, "it's got to be me."

"But Harry—" Ron started.

"No 'buts'. You knew this when we left on Dumbledore's mission."

Hermione watched as Ginny grabbed Harry's hand. "Please Harry," she begged, "don't do this. Go into hiding. We'll stop Voldemort."

"I'm sorry, Ginny, but we can never be together," he said and gently removed his hand from hers, "I really am sorry, but you deserve someone better than me and it would never have worked out between us."

Ginny's eyes immediately began to tear. Ron started to get up, ready to flip on Harry for his insensitivity but Hermione held him back with a hand. "Let him be, Ron. He has a lot on his mind."

"Now, I need to go upstairs and get ready. Good night."

Before anyone could argue with him, he hurried to the foot of the stairs. Draco was still at the top looking concerned. Harry merely brushed past him and hid in his room.

It took him less than thirty seconds to locate his Invisibility Cloak and stuff it into his pocket, along with his wand. After that, he had nothing to do, but he wasn't prepared to just leave and die quickly. He was tired. He needed sleep and yet, when he closed his eyes, his mind went into hyper-drive. Faces flashed across his mind. He saw friends, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Fred, George, Bill, Charlie, Seamus, Dean, and Neville. He saw his family, his parents, Sirius, Dumbledore, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, and surprisingly, the Dursley's. He saw the Order with Mad-Eye Moody, Lupin, Tonks, Snape, McGonagall, and the other Order members. Then he thought of Draco.

Harry immediately felt cold. Tears began to form and yet their heat did nothing to melt the ice-cold pit in his stomach. He wanted Draco. He didn't want to die. He wanted to live, to be in Draco's arms where he was safe, where he didn't have to die.

Before he knew what he was doing, Harry found himself outside Draco's door. He knocked once. Draco answered it with a quizzical expresstion, but when Harry fell into his arms, Draco understood. "Harry, love, what's wrong?"

Draco had to practically carry the other man to the bed where he sat down with Harry. "Harry, talk to me."

"I-I don't want to die!" he rasped out between sobs.

"Oh Harry," Draco whispered and he drew the sobbing boy closer to him so that he could hold him tighter. "I don't want you to die, either."

With a sudden ferocity, Harry attacked Draco's mouth with his own. Surprised, but definitely not complaining, Draco returned the kiss with equal fervor. Their kisses began to run together, heating their bodies as their hands roamed the other's body. Draco moaned into the kiss as Harry's hands found his nipples. He returned the favor in kind to Harry and soon they were beginning to divest each other of their clothes. Only when Harry's hands began to fumble with Draco's pants did Draco pull away.

"What?" Harry asked, taken aback.

"We can't do this."

"This is what you wanted, isn't it?" he whispered, sounding angry and hurt. Draco winced at the tone.

"Yes, but not like this."

"Then how? You want to bottom?"

"That's not what I meant. What I meant is that I won't do anything that I know you wouldn't want if you were thinking clearly."

"I _am_ thinking clearly."

"No, you're not. I will always be here for you, but I will always respect your wishes, as well."

"But what if I don't come back from the battle with Voldemort?" he asked. He hadn't told Draco that he wasn't coming back. Maybe it was time to tell him.

Draco smiled sadly. "Well that just gives you more of a reason to come back to me. Besides, you survived a direct attack from Voldemort at the height of his power when you were only one year old," he squeezed Harry's hand, "and I know that now that you know magic and you have had training, you can beat the old bastard trying to make his comeback."

Hearing that, Harry lost his nerve. He couldn't tell Draco that he wasn't going to come back. Draco pulled completely away from Harry and redressed. Harry did the same and even though his sweater was still warm, Harry felt cold. Draco held such faith in him. He didn't have the heart to tell him the truth. He couldn't stand to see the devastated look on the Slytherin's face. But he couldn't leave yet. He wanted to spend a little bit longer with his love.

"C-can we at least cuddle?"

Smiling, Draco opened his arms and let Harry snuggle into them. The world seemed to stop for Harry and his mind finally calmed. Whatever the problem, he was sure it would be solved later. Nothing could happen to him while he was wrapped in Draco's embrace. "Thank you," he whispered.

Draco laid a chaste kiss on harry's forehead and replied, "Anytime, love."

That was how Harry finally fell asleep. Head nestled on Draco's chest, arms wrapped around Draco and in Draco's strong embrace. He fell asleep thinking that he wished he wouldn't have to die because he had found something so worth living for.

Morning came far too early and Harry stirred before anyone else. He had the strength to go now and he slipped his Invisibility Cloak over his shoulders. He looked down at Draco and smiled. Giving him one last light kiss, Harry placed his Christmas present to Draco into his love's right hand. "Goodbye, love. Maybe we'll meet in Heaven. I'll wait for you."

Then he covered his head and slipped out of Number 12 Grimmauld Place before anyone awoke.

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A/N: Well, here you go! Sorry about the long wait! I've been trying to get back to this, but unfortunately, I've gotten slammed with college work. Finals are coming up, so please understand that I probably won't update for a bit. I promise to update as soon as I can but I have to get my papers done and study myself to death. I really hope you liked this and please R&R. Tell me what you think. Wish me luck! Thanks for sticking with me! 


	11. Come back

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything that has to do with Harry Potter. I only mess with their lives.

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**Chapter 11

When Draco finally woke up, he wasn't surprised to find himself alone. He was surprised, however, to find a small box clutched in his right hand. Sitting up, he opened it and found a silver serpentine pendant strung along a silver link chain. A note fell out and Draco picked it up.

_Thanks for everything._

He flipped it over, hoping for something more, but it was blank. Looking into the serpent's eyes, Draco noticed that the emeralds glittered oddly. Not like a regular stone, but like real eyes. Eyes that looked oddly like Harry's. His heart gave a little pang. He missed Harry.

Last night had been something Draco had wanted since he'd realized his feelings for Harry. He wondered how long it would take for Harry to come back. Sighing, Draco fastened the necklace around his neck and began to get ready for the day.

Though he had decided to remain in his room, well away from everyone else's anxiety, he still felt it. Every creak made him strain his ears to hear Harry's footsteps. But, if Harry walked through the door, he knew he'd be able to hear quite well without trying. Even son, he had left the door cracked after returning his breakfast dishes to the hallway.

A soft knock roused Draco from his doze and he slowly sat up. "What?" he called.

"Can-can I c-come talk to you?" It was Granger.

"Yeah, I guess."

When she stepped into the room, he was slightly surprised to see that she was crying. Though he knew it was so very un-Malfoy-like, he motioned for her to sit beside him and conjured a few tissues for her. She accepted them with a weak smile but her tears only flowed harder.

"What's wrong?"

"He's-he's no-not c-coming b-back," she finally managed.

"What?"

Her watery eyes found his and he knew. He'd forgotten to breathe and it wasn't until his lungs began to burn that he remembered.

"How do you know?" he demanded. "Is he-Is he already—" but he couldn't bring himself to finish the sentence.

Hermione shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know."

Draco grasped onto that glimmer of light with all his might. "Then there's still hope. He'll come home, I know it," he added, trying to convince himself just as much as Hermione.

She shook her head. "He has to die to kill Voldemort."

"That doesn't make sense," Draco replied. "What do you mean? How do you know that?"

"I-I just d-do. He's not c-com-ming back."

She sounded so convinced that Draco couldn't quell the doubt that had turned all of his insides to ice. Suddenly, the thought of never holding the boy next to him was frightening. It couldn't be true. Harry had to come back. He _had_ to. If he didn't, Draco knew that he'd kill him, as redundant as that sounded. His fingers absent-mindedly touched the serpent pendant hanging around his neck. "Come back to me, Harry. Please, come back to all of us."

Hermione continued to sob silently beside him and Draco watched her for a moment. Then, he reached out and gripped her hand. She was shaking. He smiled at her and gave her hand a squeeze.

"He'll be okay. He'll come back. Just hang in there for him. You wait, buy the end of tonight, he'll have returned to us. You'll see."

She half-heartedly returned his smile. Shaking her head, Hermione chewed on her lower lip. He was wrong. She knew it. She knew Harry had to die and to hear such conviction that the Boy Who Lived would live through another round with Voldemort hurt her. She had meant to cushion the blow for him but he just replied ot have faith in Harry. Hermione prayed that Draco was right but her mind knew that he was wrong. It was just so horrible.

As they sat there, they heard the faint tape of a wand and the door open. Draco and Hermione both looked at the other, neither daring to hope. Then, together, they bolted out of the room. When the door came into view, everyone was crowded around someone.

"Harry!" Hermione cried.

The crowd parted and they saw Lupin standing in the doorway, badly beaten. But behind him…

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A/N: Well, I've gotten through one week of crunch time. One more week of that and then it's final's week! Yay! But I took a break to bring you guys the next chapter in this story. Look back for another chapter within the next two weeks or so. At latest, I should have the next chapter up by the end of my finals week. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! Leave me a comment and guess who it is that's behind him! lol Let me know what you think, too, please! R&R! Thankies! 


	12. Harry?

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

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Chapter 12

…was no one. Silently, Lupin closed the door behind him, not looking at anyone. Draco's heart dropped to his feet. It felt like losing Harry all over again. He was gripping the serpent so hard the metal was biting into his skin. 'Harry, please," he whispered, pleading, "please come back to me."

"Where's Arthur?" Mrs. Weasley demand.

Lupin nodded, trying to gather enough strength to talk. "Fine. He's fine. But it's bad. The Death Eaters outnumber us and Harry—"

"Is he alive?" Draco blurted out.

Lupin looked up at him, an eyebrow raised. "Yes, but he's not in great shape. He didn't seem to be really fighting back."

A cold dread seeped back into Draco's body, having been temporarily vanquished by the hope of Harry's survival. Images of blood covering Harry's face surfaced and Draco pushed them back. No. He's still alive. Draco had to keep that in mind. Without listening to anything else, Draco returned to his room, still gripping his serpentine pendant. Hermione followed him.

"You really do love him, don't you?" she asked.

Draco stared at the floor. "Yes."

"Then go after him."

"But you said—"

"I can be wrong. Harry can be wrong. We're not infallible for Merlin's sake!"

"In any case, I can't."

"Why?" she demanded. "If you love him, save him!"

"And risk him dying in vain?!" he exploded. "It may suck sitting here and waiting, but we have to. Don't get me wrong, I want him to come back more than you know, but I would hate myself if he died in vain because I screwed up the plan. Do _you_ want that hanging over your head? _'Harry Potter the boy who died for __**nothing**__!' _because his best friends didn't trust him? No, I didn't think so." Tears had begun to well in his eyes again. "But I pray to Merlin that he comes back."

Before Hermione could respond, the door creaked open. Ginny popped her head around it. "Sorry to interrupt, but…" she trailed off, glancing at Draco and then at Hermione.

Draco sighed. If this ever got out to his parents, he'd be skinned alive. Of course, if they found out that he was trying to woo Harry Potter, they'd throw him into a huge vat of salt after he'd been skinned alive. "Come in, Ginny."

Eyes going even wider, she took a tentative step into the room. "Thanks."

"What did you want?" he asked, ignoring her thanks.

With another glance at Hermione, she mumbled, "Well, um, I wanted to ask, why do you care about Harry so much?"

He'd had a feeling that someone besides Hermione would figure out his odd behavior but he really didn't want to set off the red-headed girl. "I don't."

"Then you wouldn't have asked about him so urgently when Lupin got back."

"I just wanted to know if Voldemort had been killed by him. So sue me for not wanting Voldemort to win."

Hermione nudged Draco in the ribs. "She deserves the truth, Malfoy."

"You love him," Ginny murmured to her knees.

"Yes, and I daresay, he loves me, too."

Her pale face turned white under her freckles. "H-he told you that?"

"No. He's still too confused."

"Oh."

Draco could almost visibly see her heart breaking as he told her that he loved Harry. He almost grabbed her hand but then he stopped. She was a Weasley after all. "I'm sorry, but I had to be true to myself. I had to tell him that I loved him. I really am sorry."

"So he's-he's gay?"

Hermione patted Ginny on the shoulder. "I'm pretty sure Harry hasn't figured it out yet, but do you remember when Harry was really happy right after Christmas?" At Ginny's nod, Hermione continued, "That was because he was with Draco. I had hoped Harry would tell you."

"But it doesn't matter anymore," Draco butted in.

Ginny looked up. "What?"

"Harry has to die to destroy Voldemort. He's not coming back."

Tears sprung from Ginny's eyes as she clamped her hand over her open mouth. "No." She stood up and made to grab Draco by the neck before Hermione grabbed her. "No!" she screamed, "No, you're wrong! Harry's coming back! He's coming back!"

Hermione took Ginny out of the room and Draco lay back down. Could this day get any worse? He thought it was interesting that news of Harry's coming death had gotten a more violent reaction than the news of Harry being gay. He didn't want Harry to die, either.

Somehow, in his emotionally drained state, Draco fell asleep on his bed. He dreamed of Harry dueling Voldemort. They both looked battered, but Harry was definitely worse for the wear sporting a heavily bleeding head wound and several nasty gashes. Curses were flying everywhere. Harry was tiring, now barely dodging the jets of green. His voice was becoming breathier by the moment. Draco wanted to scream out. Voldemort had aimed and Harry couldn't get out of the way. It was going to hit him.

In slow motion, Draco watched as the green jet collided with Harry sent him flying. The Golden Boy lay crumpled on the ground but the spell had rebounded. It now was hitting Voldemort and he was instantaneously disintegrated into ash. "Harry," Draco called out, "Harry!"

But the boy did not stir. Back in number 12 Grimmauld Place, Draco was crying out in his sleep, his right hand clutching his pendant. "Harry," he was muttering, "Harry, come back. Come back!"

A loud crash in the hall downstairs sent Mrs. Black's portrait into a fit of howls and woke Draco with a start. A door slammed shut and Draco bolted from the room once more. Hermione and Ginny were already halfway down the stairs, moving toward the group of people at the door. Draco saw Mr. Weasley, Mad-Eye, Tonks, and other Order members. "Harry?" Draco called.

Mr. Weasley shook his head as he looked up at Draco, eyes full of sadness. The group parted and what Draco saw made him gasp.

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A/N: Well, I've updated, just like I promised! I tell you, my finals week was so exhausting, it was all I could do not to just crawl into bed and sleep. But I knew you'd all want this chapter. So what do you guys think? R&R please! Have an awesome holiday celebrating whatever it is you celebrate! Thankies! (Please don't hate me for the cliffie...it's for your own good!) 


	13. I Love You

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. If I did, I wouldn't be writing fanfiction, I'd be writing more books and Deathly Hallows would have ended differently and Fred wouldn't have died. Yeah, I could go on, but I think you guys get the point.

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**

Chapter 13

Draco couldn't believe it. Completely supported by the doorframe, bleeding, bruised, and barely conscious, Harry tilted his head upward. "Harry!" he cried and then rushed through the crowd to get to him.

"I-I came back," he rasped and Draco could feel that he had no strength to hold himself up.

Draco took all of Harry's weight upon himself as he held his love close to him. He couldn't believe it. Because everyone had continued saying that Harry would die, he'd come to believe it subconsciously. Now, holding Harry, feeling his ragged breathing, the uncomfortable knot that had taken up residence in his stomach vanished. He couldn't believe it.

Harry could barely see under his swollen eyes, but he could see enough of Draco to know that he was crying. "Don't cry," he forced. His voice was scratchy and rough.

"Tears of joy, love. You came back. You came back to me," Draco whispered. "I love you so much."

Before Harry could respond, desperate lips were crushing his own and if he'd had any more energy, Harry would have reciprocated the force. This is why his had fought with himself the entire way home. He'd wanted desperately to fall asleep and let one of the other Order members to take him back to Grimmauld place, but he'd wanted to see Draco's face when he returned. He had to know that Draco was okay. He had to know that Draco hadn't tried to follow him. He conjured strength, he didn't know from where, to kiss his love back. As Draco pulled away, Harry finally gave in to his body and let the darkness consume him.

Draco buckled under his love's weight and panic clutched his heart. "Harry?" he cried. "Harry?! Someone help!"

Immediately three other hands were there, gently taking Harry from Draco. "No!" he yelled. No, Harry had survived, he couldn't die now! "Don't take him from me!"

A hand on my shoulder gently but firmly pulled me away as my fingers slipped on the blood that was coating Harry's arm. "He's going to be fine, Draco, he's just passed out."

I turned to look at Hermione and saw the calm truth in her eyes. She gave me a smile and gripped my hand in hers. "He came back, Draco. He lived."

After they had settled Harry on the couch, the same couch this had all started on, and Lupin had treated Harry's wounds, Draco took up his post in the plush chair at Harry's head. As the others moved to the kitchen to have their wounds treated, Ron, Ginny, and Hermione sat in the living room.

"That was absolutely disgusting," Ron spat.

"What?"

Draco studied Harry's face, carefully watching his chest rise and fall. Running his fingers through that black, unruly hair, he waited for Ron to attack his relationship unwilling to defend it without Harry there to help him. If Ron was a good friend, he surely wouldn't be attacking it.

"I can't believe you corrupted him, Malfoy. What did you have to do? Drug him? Imperius him?"

"Shut up, Ron."

Surprised, Draco looked up at Ginny. She was glaring at her brother. Then she looked at Draco and smiled sadly. "Just make him happy."

"What?" Ron exploded. "What do you mean? You and Harry were supposed to be together! That's how it was supposed to be!"

"Who are you to tell anyone else how to live their life?" she demanded.

Before Ron could respond, I held up a hand. "Harry needs his rest and if people are fighting, it won't help his recover. Please, I'm not asking for me, I'm asking for Harry," I added as Ron started to respond.

"Besides, Ron, you have Draco to thank for Harry's survival. Without him, I think he might have died in that fight with Voldemort," Hermione added, givng him a look I couldn't quite understand.

Without saying anything else, I watched Ron leave in a huff and I returned to watching Harry. His even breathing was calming, or maybe it was just the fact that I knew he was going to be okay. Sighing, Hermione got up. "I guess I'll go up and try to calm him down. Don't take it personally, Draco, he just—he needs time to come around. He will."

Draco tried to give a confident smile and she returned it. "You really did save his life. Thank you."

He watched her leave and Ginny left with her. Draco laid a kiss on his love's forehead and ran his hands over Harry's face. He couldn't believe it. He was really okay.

A few hours later, Draco was sitting on the floor, staring in awe at the Boy-Who-Lived-Again. "Are they gone?" Harry whispered.

"Harry?"

His beautiful green eyes flickered open and he smiled at Draco. "I see you're wearing my necklace."

Draco nodded, briefly touching it. "Of course."

"I bewitched it before I gave it to you." Harry reached out to touch it with a shaky hand and smiled. "That way, I can hear you when we're apart. I heard you asking me to come back."

Draco laughed and hugged Harry so tightly Harry rasped, "Can't breathe."

"Oh, sorry."

When Draco made to move off of Harry, he felt tan arms tighten around his waist. "I fight for my life, I fight not to die, and all I get is a hug?"

Before Harry knew what was happening, he found Draco straddling him on the couch, kissing him until his lungs burned from lack of air. His body was heating up, blood rushing to a certain area and he could feel Draco on top of him going through the same. "Merlin, I can't believe you're here."

Harry felt a pang of guilt plague his heart. A pang that was quickly forgotten as Draco's hands slipped under his shirt. This was why he'd fought to stay alive. This is why he'd refused to die under Voldemort.

"Well, it's certainly nice to see you've recovered so quickly," Ginny said.

Draco immediately jumped off Harry, a cute blush covering his cheeks. "Sorry."

Harry forced himself to sit up and looked directly into Ginny's eyes. "I'm sorry as well."

Yes, he was apologizing for that little display, but also for not telling Ginny that he was gay and she understood that. "I understand. Friends?"

"Friends," he smiled, but it faltered when he thought about her brother. "What about Ron?"

"What about him?"

Harry looked over to see Ron standing in the doorway leading to the kitchen. They spoke silently for a moment and Harry smiled when Ron gave a slight nod. Draco didn't know what to make of it, but since he wasn't yelling or attacking them, Draco considered that to be an improvement.

Mrs. Weasley came in, flanked by the other Order members and immediately started to force food down Harry's throat. "Y'know, Mrs. Weasley, I'm still really tired. Could I maybe sleep a little more?"

"Oh, of course, sweetie. You just let me know when you're hungry, okay?" she patted him on the head and leaned down to give Harry a hug. "I already know about you and Draco," she whispered, "I just want you to be happy."

When she pulled back, Harry smiled at her and made to roll over to go back to sleep. Quietly, Ron and Ginny left as well. "Goodnight, love," Draco whispered, kissing Harry's forehead and also making to leave.

"And how am I supposed to sleep without my favorite pillow?"

Draco turned around to see Harry fully awake and pressed against the back of the couch to make room for Draco, smiling. Without a second thought, Draco slipped under him and held Harry close to him. Harry immediately snuggled into him, burying his face into the crook of Draco's neck.

Draco loved to be so close to him. "Harry, I love you."

"Draco, I love you, too."

"Really?" he asked.

Harry placed a soft kiss on Draco's lips. "Yep. Now, show me why I fought so hard to return to you."

Draco readily complied and no one else entered the room for quite a long time.

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A/N: This is the last chapter! Wahoo! I hope you like the last chapter. I'm happy with it. Anyway, I'll be writing more so if you like my writing, check back every so often for more. Please R&R! Thanks for staying with my story till the end! See ya! 


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